Theos-Talk Archives (September 1998 Message tl00104)

got this from another list.

Chuck the Heretic

 Are you having God problems?  Has Jehova's jealousy been getting you down?
Have your prayers just not been getting the job done?
     Get JehovaHack 2.0 and uncover the secrets to the world's most popular
godform!  Inside this amazingly EASY TO USE program:
                *YHVH command codes and the Semitic Back Door!
                *Enter secret Archangel chatrooms!
                *Holy-ghosting-  become invisible to any entity!
                *The secrets of immaculate conception!
                *Make women from ribs!
                *PRONOUNCE THE TETRAGRAMMATON  lightning-free!
                *Circumvent those pesky Commandments!
                *With NEW SatanPunt feature, send anyone straight to Hell!
                *Manifest your desires without piety or memorizing pesky
correspondences!
                *Make the Saints work for YOU!
                *Stop annoying Jehova Jealousy- make Him play nice with other
gods!
                *And much, much MORE!!!
    The ancient Hebrews were JehovaHackers; now YOU CAN BE TOO!!  It's SO
EASY!!
          Find out what the Christians, Jews, and Muslims, among others, have
been missing, even though it was RIGHT UNDER THEIR NOSES!!!
             What would you expect to pay for this amazing software?
                                           Allegience to a cult that could
damage your health?
                                           Blood sacrifice?
                                       NO!!! You caan have the full version of
JehovaHack 2.0 for the insanely LOW PRICE of just ONE SOUL!!  It doesn't even
have to be your own!!!**
               **Must be a hominid soul.
Requires: Brain homo erectus or later, 1 day short term memory, 2 days
reccomended. 
               Just Mindlink to Black Suede Shoe on the lower astral near you
to download the FREE TRIAL VERSION or buy this EXCITING PROGRAM!!

      Also available or coming soon:
                 JEHOVA PLUS helps JehovaHack run faster on slow machines!
                 CIRCUMCISION WIZARD lets you create cool designs!
                 PROPHET v1.5   See the future!! (not recommended on slow
machines)
                 CALF ENHANCE   Get more out of a sacrifice!
                 CREATOR  don't just mess around with somebody else's world!
Make your own!!
                 AKASHIK EDIT 3.1   Wish it didn't happen?  Now IT DIDN'T!!

                                          Only from Black Suede Shoe