Theos-Talk Archives (January 1997 Message tl00052)

JRC wrote:

> The relationship winds up being a screen upon which almost every trait,
> positive and negative, reflects itself. Every glitch, every density, every
> blind-spot, every imbalance in one's growth inevitably causes turbulence,
> and every achievement, every glow, every refinement of character or
> expansion of awareness also, just as inevitably, enhances the relationship
> and causes it to sing. 

Quite so. Being with a person 7 days a week is different from loving
at a distance. That's where the rubber hits the road.

> Sometimes I wonder what would happen if every religion on earth decided to
> issue a proclamation - saying that for the course of but one single year,
> everyone ought to completely forget about loving "God", or "Humanity", and
> focus instead completely on attempting - for that one single year - to
> love just *one* other person ... but to love that person as well and
> completely as was humanly possible. I wonder if perhaps at the end of that
> year an enormous number of our worst social, political and economic
> problems would suddenly seem to have easy solutions, whether all sorts of
> social turmoil would seem to have - almost as though by magic - smoothed
> itself out - whether most of the virtues religions attempt (mostly
> unsuccessfully) to inculcate in their followers wouldn't wind up - without
> even delibrately trying - being developed quite naturally and of their own
> accord. 

The gist of your statement I agree with. I would have to point out that there
is no true love without love of God. Ordinary love of a person has strings
attached to it. "I will love you if you stay within this little box of
acceptable behavior." "I love you as long as you stroke my ego" ... etc.

If you love God in the person, at least as much as a fallable human being
can, your love is true love. You have to see God buried behind each
temper tantrum, behind each foible.

Also, I wouldn't necessarily be harsh on everyone whose marriage is something
of a wreck. Karma can be pretty complex. One of those "glitches" you talked
about may be just the hole in a person's armor that derails an otherwise
loving person. My mother, for example, was a very loving person, but her
marriage and a few of her isolated samskaras synergistically combined to
often bring out the worst in her.