Jun 08, 1996 12:00 PM
I am just like you.
I am trying to work this T/theosophy thing so I can rise above everyone else
who is trying to work it.
Why deny the fundamental psychogenetic mechanism of the long journey back to
the Self? It is the essential nature of ~I AM~ to be without peer. If you
look around and find you have some peers crowding you on the rung of the
ladder upon which you stand, it is only natural to try to ascend to the next
rung and leave them behind. When you get to ~I AM~, you can relax: you are
as high as anyone can get. You are even higher than your own semi-Selves who
did all that climbing for you.
You say that when it comes to T/theosophy you have no interest in trying to
establish yourself as superior to everyone else? Sure, sure: that is why
you just announced yourself as superior to those who may have such a base
motive. You are pure; they are not; you are BETTER.
You say that the foregoing is just one of those existential catch-22's that
one can never escape but only ~transcend~ by living "outside the context" of
where the dilemma is formulated? Well, that understanding makes you BETTER,
too, doesn't it?
Trust me. The problem is insurmountable. Where a semi-Self
("ego-formation") is found at all, I can assure you that it will be fighting
to establish its own particular ~I-AM-such-and-such~ as dominant over
everyone else's similar ~I-AM-such-and-such~. If that superordination cannot
be accomplished, the semi-Self disappears and another semi-Self tries its
Did you trust me in the foregoing? Good. Then the mental semi-Self I was
using a moment ago gained the subordinate it was after. That particular
egoic-wolf got a meal, so to speak.
And we have been doing a lot of talking about wolves and sheep. After giving
the subject much thought, however, I have concluded that there probably ~are~
no sheep. There are only wolves and more wolves, the ostensible difference
being merely which wolf-trap the wolf is in.
Let us see how the traps might work regarding the issue of capitalizing the
~T~ in ~Theosophy~:
1) The Desire-Mental Trap. This semi-Self is the delusion "I REALLY AM the
idea I am drawn to." A person indulging at this level would be attracted by
the ideas in THE SECRET DOCTRINE and more or less promptly "believe" in them,
even if he or she only understood their rough outlines. A wolf in this trap
would want the term ~Theosophy~ to apply in a strict-letter way only to what
could be found in specific "Source Materials." He or she would be
authority-oriented and perhaps use quotations heavily. He or she could feel
BETTER than others because his or her egoic delusion is based upon
"pure-strain" knowledge; additionally, he or she would have the psychological
satisfaction of "working in the cause of something Really important."
2) The Mental Trap. This is the desire-free mental semi-Self. Here, simple
like/dislike for ideas is replaced by pure, dispassionate reason. Source
Materials would still be relied upon, but a personal, objective understanding
of the subjects involved would take precedence over HPB's version of them if
it became necessary. The trap here is that because so much reading and
ratiocination is necessary to understand THE SECRET DOCTRINE, the person who
regularly indulges a mental semi-Self of this nature often forgets to keep
asking if all the elaborata he or she is learning is ~actually true~. In any
case, the wolf in such a trap would welcome the capital ~T~--as long, that
is, as his or her personal understandings of the subjects could be included
under the "Theosophical Tent." The person would naturally think he or she
was BETTER than those who came to him or her to be taught "Theosophy."
3) The Spirit-Mental Trap. This is the trap for the cool people. They have
taken seriously the definition for small-~t~ ~theosophy~ and try to develop
"transcendental, mystical, or intuitive insight or higher perception" in
order to get at Truth for themselves. For them, a capital ~T~ in ~Theosophy~
is only acceptable in the same sense as the capital ~T~ in ~Truth~.
Sometimes people do not stay in this trap for more than a moment, but then
slip back into the Mental or Desire-Mental Traps. That is ok, since what
they bring down with them cannot but help in some way--especially in the
development of coherent rational understandings. All in all, however, it is
probably better to stay in the Spirit-Mental Trap for as long as possible.
Actually, there is only one little drawback to it: the tendency to go
around thinking, "If other people could only see the divine inspiration in my
ideas, they would realize that I must be ABSOLUTELY BETTER; therefore they
should probably be worshiping me."
Can it be that your secret-of-secrets is that you have had that thought from
time to time?
I am just like you: I wouldn't admit it either. . . .
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