Theos-Talk Archives (April 1997 Message tl00141)

For the benefit of our new users here is a tutorial.

Like prehistoric cave dwellers, the devotees of electronic
bulletin-boards and "e-mail" have struggled to find a new way to
express themselves. Wall painting would not work. Words, it seems, are
not enough. Inarticulate sounds cannot be displayed on screens.  To
make their messages feel more like personal contact, they have hit on
using the punctuation marks on an ordinary keyboard in order to pull
faces at each other. To read these signs, you have to put your head on
your left shoulder.
 
The basic unit is:
                                 :-)
 
the "smiley", a standard smiling face. In context, this can mean "I'm
happy to hear from you", or other pleasantries.  The smiley can also
wink:
                                 ;-)
or frown:
                                 :-(
 
among other things. The language can express many things about the
user's appearance:
 
                8-)   :-{)   8:-)   :-)-8   :-Q   @:-)
 
These signs mean, respectively, that the user wears sunglasses, has a
moustache, is a little girl, is a big girl, smokes, wears a turban.
 
The smiley can also indicate some subtleties of mood and response:
 
                     :-D   :-/   :-e   :-7   :-X
 
These mean that he is laughing, is sceptical, is disappointed, is wry,
is keeping his lips sealed.
 
Many of the signs (perhaps the majority in use on America's biggest
computer networks) are simply absurd fun, verging on the
unintelligible:
 
                       :-F   *:o)   +-:-)   @=
 
The user is a buck-toothed vampire with one tooth missing, is a clown,
holds religious office, is pro-nuclear. The hieroglyph of our title
means that the user is a drunk, devilish chef with a toupee in an
updraft, a moustache and a double chin.  Now you know what electronic
mail is used for.
 
                                    =*=
 
Here's a smile directory - Hope it lightens you day.
 
 
 The Unofficial Smilie Dictionary
 --------------------------------
 
 :-)   Your basic smilie. This smilie is used to inflect a sarcastic or
       joking statement since we can't hear voice inflection over Unix.
 ;-)   Winky smilie. User just made a flirtatious and/or sarcastic remark.
       More of a "don't hit me for what I just said" smilie.
 :-(   Frowning smilie. User did not like that last statement or is upset
       or depressed about something.
 :-I   Indifferent smilie. Better than a Frowning smilie but not quite as
       good as a happy smilie
 :->   User just made a really biting sarcastic remark. Worse than a :-).
:->  User just made a really devilish remark.
;->  Winky and devil combined. A very lewd remark was just made.
 
 Those are the basic ones...Here are some somewhat less common ones:
 
 (-:   User is left handed
 %-)   User has been staring at a green screen for 15 hours straight
 :*)   User is drunk
 [:]   User is a robot
 8-)   User is wearing sunglasses
 B:-)  Sunglasses on head
 ::-)  User wears normal glasses
 B-)   User wears horn-rimmed glasses
 8:-)  User is a little girl
 :-)-8 User is a Big girl
 :-{)  User has a mustache
 :-{}  User wears lipstick
 {:-)  User wears a toupee
 }:-(  Toupee in an updraft
 :-[   User is a Vampire
 :-E   Bucktoothed vampire
 :-F   Bucktoothed vampire with one tooth missing
 :-7   User just made a wry statement
 :-*   User just ate something sour
 :-)~  User drools
 :-~)  User has a cold
 :'-(  User is crying
 :'-)  User is so happy, s/he is crying
 :-@   User is screaming
 :-#   User wears braces
 :^)   User has a broken nose
 :v)   User has a broken nose, but it's the other way
 :_)   User's nose is sliding off of his face
 :<)   User is from an Ivy League School
 :-&   User is tongue tied.
 =:-)  User is a hosehead
 -:-)  User is a punk rocker
 -:-(  (real punk rockers don't smile)
 :=)   User has two noses
 +-:-) User is the Pope or holds some other religious office
 `:-)  User shaved one of his eyebrows off this morning
 ,:-)  Same thing...other side
 |-I   User is asleep
 |-O   User is yawning/snoring
 :-Q   User is a smoker
 :-?   User smokes a pipe
 O-)   Megaton Man On Patrol!  (or else, user is a scuba diver)
 O :-) User is an angel (at heart, at least)
 :-P   Nyahhhh!
 :-S   User just made an incoherent statement
 :-D   User is laughing (at you!)
 :-X   User's lips are sealed
 :-C   User is really bummed
 :-/   User is skeptical
 C=:-) User is a chef
 @=    User is pro-nuclear war
 *<:-) User is wearing a Santa Claus Hat
 :-o   Uh oh!
 (8-o  It's Mr. Bill!
 *:o)  And Bozo the Clown!
 3:]   Pet smilie
 3:[   Mean Pet smilie
 d8=   Your pet beaver is wearing goggles and a hard hat.
 E-:-) User is a Ham radio operator
 :-9   User is licking his/her lips
 %-6   User is braindead
 [:-)  User is wearing a walkman
 (:I   User is an egghead
 <:-I  User is a dunce
 K:P   User is a little kid with a propeller beenie
 @:-)  User is wearing a turban
 :-0   No Yelling!  (Quiet Lab)
 :-:   Mutant Smilie
       The invisible smilie
 .-)   User only has one eye
 ,-)   Ditto...but he's winking
 X-(   User just died
 8 :-) User is a wizard
 C=}>;*{))  Mega-Smilie... A drunk, devilish chef with a toupee in an updraft,
                           a mustache, and a double chin
 
 Note: A lot of these can be typed without noses to make midget smilies.
 
 :)  Midget smilie
 :]  Gleep...a friendly midget smilie who will gladly be your friend
 =)  Variation on a theme...
 :} - What should we call these? (what?)
 :) - Happy
 :> - what?
 :@ - what?
 :D - Laughter
 :I - Hmmm...
 :( - Sad
 :[ - Real Downer
 :< - what?
 :{ - what?
 :O - Yelling
 :C - what?
 :Q - what?
 :,( - Crying
 [] - Hugs and
 :* - Kisses
 |I - Asleep
 |^o -Snoring
 
 
   :-`  smiley spitting out its chewing tobacco
   :-1  smiley bland face
   :-!          "
   :-@  smiley face screaming
   :-#| smiley face with bushy mustache
   :-$  smiley face with it's mouth wired shut
   :-%  smiley banker
   :-6  smiley after eating something sour
   :^)  smiley with pointy nose (righty)
   :-7  smiley after a wry statement
   8-)  smiley swimmer
   :-*  smiley after eating something bitter
   :-&  smiley which is tongue-tied
   :-0  smiley orator
        smiley invisible man
   (:-( unsmiley frowning
   (:-) smiley big-face
   ):-)         "
   ):-(  unsmiley big-face
   )8-)  scuba smiley big-face
   =:-) smiley punk-rocker
   =:-(  (real punk rockers don't smile)
   +:-) smiley priest
   :-q  smiley trying to touch its tongue to its nose
   :-e  disappointed smiley
   :-t  cross smiley
   :-i  semi-smiley
   :-o  smiley singing national anthem
   :-p  smiley sticking its tongue out (at you!)
   :-[  un-smiley blockhead
   :-]  smiley blockhead
   :-{  smiley variation on a theme
   :-}  ditto
   {:-) smiley with its hair parted in the middle
   }:-) above in an updraft
   :-a  lefty smilely touching tongue to nose
   :-s  smiley after a BIZARRE comment
   :-d  lefty smiley razzing you
   g-)  smiley with ponce-nez glasses
   :-j  left smiling smilely
   :-k  beats me, looks like something, tho.
   :-l  y. a. s.
   :-:  mutant smiley
   :-\  undecided smiley
   :-|  "have an ordinary day" smiley
   ;-)  winking smiley
   :-<  real sad smiley
   :->  y.a.s.
   :-z  y.a.c.s.
   :-x  "my lips are sealed" smiley
   :-c  bummed out smiley
   :-v  talking head smiley
   :v)  left-pointing nose smiley
   :-b  left-pointing tongue smiley
   :-/  lefty undecided smiley
   :-?  smilely smoking a pipe
   .-]  one-eyed smilely
   ,-}  wry and winking
   0-)  smiley cyclops (scuba diver?)
   :-=) older smiley with mustache
   :u)  smiley with funny-looking left nose
   :n)  smiley with funny-looking right nose
   :<   midget unsmiley
   :>   midget smiley
   }:^#})  mega-smiley:  updrafted bushy-mustached pointy nosed smiley with
                        a double-chin
 
 :-)    ha ha                   ~~:-(   net.flame
 |-)    hee hee                 O |-)   net.religion
 |-D    ho ho
 :->    hey hey                 8 :-I   net.unix-wizards
 :-(    boo hoo                   X-(   net.suicide
 :-I    hmm                     E-:-I   net.ham-radio
 :-O    uh oh                    >:-I   net.startrek
 :-P    nyah nyah                3:o[   net.pets
 |-P    yuk
 
 :-}    beard
 :-{    mustache
 :-#    braces
 :-X    bow tie
 :-Q    smoker
 <:I    dunce
 (:I    egghead
 @:I    turban
 
 8-)    glasses
 B-)    horn-rims
 8:-)   glasses on forehead
 :-8(   condescending stare
 ;-)    wink
:-<     mad
 
 
 Drama :-(      Comedy :-)      Surpise :-o     Suspense 8-|
 
 Male   :-      Female  >-
 Birth  |-O     Death 8-#
 Infinity       8